juz woke up in the morning... well..... last nite went out till almost 4a.m then come back.. haha... i came back home after meeting my mei for dinner until 9+ then reach home.... then called my fren to chat on phone... then i noe they're actually at JP.... kns... bo jio mi lor... so at 10+ i went out of my home to join them at JP.... well...... these 2 days i've been trying to keep myself bz... ya.... real bz.... y? cos i cant quiet down.... i'm goin thru so called the hard time of my life? i dun wna to sit down do nth and my mind will start to wander arnd.. yes.... it's not easy.... i can feel every single pain inside.... but well... nobody will noes how it feels.... how much u'll curse and swear when i feel tt pain everytime ur mind wander... juz abit of it... it's gonna kill u... tt's how painful it is? but tt person who caused tt pain will nv noe how it feels... but from here i learned something... it really nv pays to be gd and kind... tt's wat i feel so deeply inside... i dun ask for wat in return... juz treat mi nicer abit? not sometimes u treat mi gd sometimes u treat mi like bug... i'm a human too man.. i also have feeling inside.. my heart is made of blood and flesh... maybe becos i always keep quiet.. keep all my feeling inside so ppl thought i dun feel ba... but well... how many times i've been hurt so deeply? how many times had my heart bleed? nobody noes... becos i nv choose to say it out... well... all i can say is... all these is i well deserved de ba... haiz... juz feel tt this kind of sadness... lonliness and pain.... is not something which i can use words to describe... it's so far beyond the words i noe... cos my eng too lousy ba... haha... well... i should juz face all this... let it pain till the extreme.... and i tink after all these i wont feel again le ba... it may be a gd thing as well... not for mi... but for tt someone ba... i also noe tt she wont come in again... so wat i write here she also wont noe... haha... if she does come... hope she'll see this line... if this is wat u wan... and it can make u happy... as usual... i'll do it... take care... well.. tt's all for this morning... juz wanna blog out my feeling... haha... sorry huh... u all have to read so much of my rubbish... esp those who comes here often to read... thanks for reading... it's not easy to have the same old Lingzhi again... but i'll try... juz try...